Just Face It, Your Doctor Is Simply More Important Than You

Fair warning... this a rant.

I walk into my doctor's office today for my appointment.  I'm greeted by the usual faces.  I sign in and go to sit down.  Jackie, hang on... we need you to sign this new policy.  Okay.  No biggy.  It probably has to do with insurance or copays.

Nope.

I'm paraphrasing here, but it basically reads as follows:  You are now required to give a minimum of 24-hours advance notice that you are unable to attend a scheduled appointment.  If you fail to follow this new policy, you will be assessed a fee of $25 which will be billed directly to you.  We value our patients' time, and by failing to keep an appointment or provide a minimum of 24-hours advance notice of cancellation you have kept another patient from being seen during this time period.  

OKAY, TIME OUT.

Are you kidding me?  I really have to sign this? 


Yes, it's a new policy.


But whose pocket does this $25 go into?  I mean, this is more than most people's COPAY!!


[no answer]


And, since when did my doctor care about my time?  Or anyone's for that matter?  Do you know how many times I've sat in this lobby for OVER two hours only to have to reschedule my appointment because I can't wait any longer... I had to pick up my son or be somewhere else?  


[no answer]


There's no way I'm getting out of signing.  It's crap.  But I sign.

I have SUCH a problem with this policy, both as a professional and as a patient.

First of all, $25 is WAY too much!  That is such a ridiculous amount.  Not only is that higher than many copays, to many people, that's several hours worth of wages.  Pretentious much?!

Secondly, my time does NOT matter so don't pretend it does.  That's just insulting my intelligence.

I get that it's a problem when people make appointments and fail to cancel or show up. I get it.  I really do.  But isn't there a better way of going about this?

For example, my other doctor's office has a policy in place to combat the same problem.  Their policy is that if you fail to cancel your appointment with at least 24-hours notice and fail to show up two or more times within a one year period, you're subject to no longer receiving treatment there.  Basically, they reserve the right to tell you to take your records and move on.  THAT. MAKES. SENSE.

So to all those doctors out there who simply wish to pad their pockets when a patient accidently misses an appointment once every year or two rather than weeding out the patients who continuously fail to show at scheduled appointment times by refusing to work with them anymore:  GET OVER YOURSELF!!

[end rant]

Will You Marry Me?

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This Post Secret submission made me smile.  I know, that doesn't seem like the normal response, I'm sure.  But, I smiled because it reminded me of my husband.  ;)

I can't count the number of times I've been asked the same common questions.

So, how long have you been married?

Where did you meet?

How did he propose?

Well, while it's easy to give answers to the first two questions, the third one is a little difficult to answer.  

How did he propose?  Ya know, I'm not sure that he did.  

I remember sitting in a small area with other parents during my son's gymnastics class a few months before my husband boyfriend deployed.  We were chatting--about what I don't know--and all I remember is him leaning over to me and saying well, why don't we just get married then.

PUT ON THE BREAKS!

Did I just hear him correctly?  I have him repeat himself.

Well, why don't we just get married then? 

Okay, so at least I'm not hearing things.  That's good.  I think.  

But is he serious?  

Are you serious?

Yea, I'm serious.  I mean, sure.  Why don't we just get married?

I start to laugh.  I laugh uncontrollably.  

At this time I become uncomfortably aware that I'm sitting within earshot of at least six other strangers women.  For some reason, this only makes me laugh more.

Through my own raging giggles I manage to cough out--Did you just propose?  I mean, did you REALLY just basically ask me to marry you?  At my son's gymnastics class?  Is that what's happening?  I think I've lost my mind.  

This entire interrogation is continuously cut short by my own laughter.  And it's not a mean laughter.  It's more of a shocked, happy, what the hell is going on, kinda laughter.  

Yea.  I mean, I obviously didn't mean to go into this here, but I want to marry you.  So, let's get married.  

Robert, I want to marry you too but we can't have this talk here.  Can we?  Wait, ARE we?  

I laugh some more.  We hold hands and smile, knowing that we've just given the other nosey parents something to go home and talk about.  

Later on that evening we finalized our decision in a private post-gymnastics discussion.  It was official.  We were engaged!

The next day, I nervously told my mother.  I didn't know how well it'd go over with her considering Robert and I had only been together a little over three months when we got engaged.

About two weeks later his mother and father made the drive from his home state to mine to meet me.  They brought a few rings with them for me to pick from that she thought I'd be interested in from her jewelry store.  I picked the biggest one (duh!) and Robert placed it on my finger.  

So, I guess that's the story of my proposal.  :)  

Although I sometimes look back and think that I wish he'd have proposed in some really romantic way and had planned it, I honestly don't think I'd change a thing.  Sure my proposal (if you can even call it that) wasn't romantic.  But it's ours. And honestly, I love that story.  It's us.  And I love us and everything that makes us 'us.'  

I think society puts way too much pressure on men with regard to proposals and making everything super romantic and perfect.  My favorite kinds of romance come at times where none is expected.  I think the best example of this is receiving flowers.  

I love flowers.  But don't you dare give me flowers on Valentine's Day from some expensive florist.  Instead, while you're out at the store on a random day--pick me up a small bouquet for $5 of daisies or sunflowers and surprise me with them.  That means so much more.  

So if I could tell the sender of that postcard anything, it'd be to let up on the guy.  If you love him and if you want to marry him for the right reasons, you'll look past those moments that didn't quite come in the perfect little package you'd always planned for them to.  Instead, try to appreciate how non-generic your proposal was and laugh about it.  For better or worse--it's now a part of your story.  

And ya know, I'd much rather stick with my funny, awkward proposal story and tell it until the day that I die because my husband and I have had a happy, long marriage than to trade that in for a spectacular proposal that ended in a broken engagement or divorce.  

Secret Sunday is a series of posts inspired by the weekly submissions to Post Secret.

Click here to visit postsecret.com OR click here to visit other posts by this author in this series.

I Don't Understand Either

I've been a fan of Post Secret for a while now.  In case you don't know, Post Secret is an extremely popular blog that is comprised entirely of the anonymous postcard submissions mailed in by fans each week.  Each week (on Sundays) 10 of the postcards are posted on the blog.

I'm very inspired by Post Secret on many, many levels and have decided to start a regular Secret Sunday here on the blog.  My goal is to take the postcard that stood out to me the most (either because I can relate or because it got me thinking about a specific topic) and giving my perspective on why it was significant to me.

This week's post surrounds this submission:

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I can completely relate to this poster.  I don't understand either.  

I feel that I'm at a unique age where I'm young enough to be sensitive to the necessity of a certain amount of political correctness in our society but am old enough to remember when everyone just said, "Merry Christmas."  In fact, that doesn't seem like it was too long ago.

Could it have been that 10 years ago there were no atheists?  

Did nobody celebrate Hanukkah?  

Surely not, right?  So what's changed?  

In my opinion, we've crossed a line.  We've gone from being aware of other cultures and belief systems (which, as a pretty liberal individual, I'm ALL about) to being afraid to just say whatever comes natural to us.  

Tell me Joyous Kwanzaa, please.  I'll appreciate the sentiment.  Don't be afraid to offend me.  

If it's more natural for you to say Merry Christmas, then haye... I'll take those well wishes also!  

And of course, if you prefer to say Happy Holidays, have at it!

There's a great difference between being socially aware and being socially inept, yet the line between the two seems to be blurring more over time.  

Don't purposefully offend anyone.  But don't freak out over the thought of accidently saying 'the wrong' blessing to someone during the holiday season.  

When you fumble around searching for the most politically correct phrase, any genuineness in your intent is lost in those few seconds I saw your mind flipping through its pages trying to ascertain what to say.  

Maybe I'm the only one, but it's somewhat more offensive to me when people try so hard not to be offensive.  I find myself thinking, do I come across as someone who would get upset over a 'Happy Hanukkah?' 

We're all trying to be kinder, especially this time of year.  But I don't expect for anyone to 'tiptoe' around my beliefs (or lack of).  And, I think if you took a poll, most people would agree that they would not be offended by you wishing them a blissful holiday season in the terms and expressions that mean the most to you, whether Merry Christmas or Happy Hanukkah.  

It's more human that way.  It's realer.  It's authentic and personal.  Let's keep that part of the holidays alive.  This generic 'one-size fits all holiday mumbo jumbo' isn't doing any of us any favors--at least not in my mind

I'd ask if I'm alone in this, but ya know... Post Secret made me realize today that there's at least one other who agrees with me.  

Anyone else?

Secret Sunday is a series of posts inspired by the weekly submissions to Post Secret.

Click here to visit postsecret.com OR click here to visit other posts by this author in this series.

Mind Your Own Damn Business

Ten things I wish I could say to strangers 

when given unsolicited advice about my parenting skills....

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1)  Hmm.... I'd never even considered the fact that he may be sneezing because he's allergic to something.  Wanna know what I'm allergic to?  People who don't know how to mind their own damn business!

2)  Maybe I do need to learn how to be more time efficient.  Say, while you're at the store later multi-tasking, why don't you go ahead and pick me up a bag of mind your own damn business!

3)  Thanks for the great idea!  You know, I have a great idea too!  What if.... stay with me now.... just what if.... you learned how to mind your own damn business!

4)  You sure seem to know a lot about how to parent other people's children.  But, you know what you don't know an awful lot about?  Minding your own damn business.

5)  You're right, I probably should teach him that.  You know what someone should have taught you?  How to mind your own damn business!

6)  That's absolutely fantastic.  You know what else would be fantastic?  If you'd learn to mind your own damn business!

7)  I'll get started on that right away.  You just be sure to start right away on learning how to mind your own damn business!

8)  Since you put it that way, maybe we should give him a sibling after all even though I must admit, he's never complained about being an only child.  You know what he does complain about?  People who don't mind their own damn business.

9)  Well, why didn't I think of that?  Geez, you're so smart.  Maybe you can help me out with this other problem I'm having too... See, I'm having trouble getting you to mind your own damn business!

10)  Oh, really?  Well, I'll buy that book for him then since it taught your child how to read at age 2.  Speaking of books, you know what book I've really come to enjoy?  It's in the children's section and it's entitled Mind Your Own Damn Business!

Whew!  Now, I don't know about you but I feel much better!  ;)

This post idea came from Mama Kat's Writing Workshop.  Be sure to stop by there for creative inspiration!